I curse....just a little.....

I curse, I admit this. I have decided that I'm smart enough to use a more diverse vocabulary rather than cursing. There are 2 battles raging inside my conscience that fight for me to stop cursing. One is a Christian and one is a Mom.

The Christian
I've heard many Christians say that cursing is bad. But I have a hard time believing that the "cursing" in the Bible is the same "cursing" that I am talking about today. In the Bible, to "curse" someone (in my interpretation) is to say and hope that something bad happens to someone. Take Psalms 10:7 "His mouth is full of curses and deceit and oppression; Under his tongue is mischief and wickedness." To me, anyone who who is lying, belittling, or praying for harm or injury to come upon someone is, in fact, cursing. So when people say, "I hope she gets fired...", "You are pathetic and stupid....", "You should just go kill yourself...", are cursing.

I'm pretty sure that no one in biblical days said the words "fuck" and "damn". They might have said, "what the hell." If you doubt me, click and read about the Origin of the Swear Words by Sanity Found. 

So, when I say "What the fuck?" or "What in the hell were you thinking?" or "Just pick up that damn toy?" I am not wishing ill on anyone, I'm just using an form of language that expresses my state of awe at the moment. (BTW...I do not say fuck to my kids.) 

But the Bible also says...
* "Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth" (Ephesians 4:29).
* "If you think you are being religious, but can't control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and everything you do is useless" (James 1:26, CEV).

Soooooooo, I I can't control myself, the person I know best, then what am I really doing?

Mom
One day Eve was doing THE MOST!!! Whining, throwing stuff in the car and fighting with her brothers all while we're trying to run errands. So we pulled up at our last errand stop, I told Eve that I was going to "whoop her little ass." So I proceeded to get out the car and get Eve out. I gave her a whoopin while her brothers exited the car from the other side. I then bent down to Eve's level and told her to dry her face and get herself together because we are about to go into the building. (I don't want her walking around with that "I just got my ass beat" face.) So we go in, do our shopping and leave. When we get to the car, Elliott says...

Elliott: Mom, you forgot to whoop Eve's ass.
Me: What?
Elliott: You forgot to whoop Eve's ass Mom.
Me: ......😳...
Elliott: Remember Mom, when we were in the car you said that you were going to whoop Eve's ass. See, you forgot.
Me: Elliott, you shouldn't say that word.
Elliott: What word Mom, whoop????
Me: No, you shouldn't say ass. It's an adult word. 
Elliott: Oh okay Mom. Sooooo, are you going to whoop Eve's...you know...that word I can't say.
Me: (Eyes closed and hand over face) I already did Elliott.
Elliott: But I didn't see it.
Me: Get in the car. Just get in the car.

Sooooo, yeeeaaaaa, if I don't want my kids cursing, then maybe I shouldn't??? I don't know if that's a good justification. There's alot of things I can/should do that my kids can't....yet. Plus, if there's a case of "stranger danger" and someone is trying to grab you, I tell my kids to let the F-bombs drop!!!!

So, people can you help me to find better words to use? Leave me some actual substitutions for fuck, damn, hell and shit. I don't want those fake subs either, like "Instead of saying fuck, say "Oh fudge-cake" instead. No, I mean real intellectual words to increase my vocabulary.

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